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If you are looking for the best and most inspiring books to help you stop caring about what others think, then you’ve come to the right place.
I am going to share with you a number of authors that have helped me shift my mindset from “the opinions of others” to focusing on transforming “the opinions I have of myself.”
But why do we start caring about what others think of us in the first place?
After struggling with chronic anxiety, chronic depression, self-hate, and overthinking for many years, as well as compassionately listening to others struggle with the same problems, I believe that the core reason behind this kind of mindset is
- lack of self-love, or
- excessive worry and fear, or
When we lack self-love, we are also likely to experience self-doubt, lack of confidence, and low self-esteem, all of which can easily cause us to place more value on what others think is best for us, rather than what we think is right.
Excessive worry and fear is a common symptom of anxiety disorders, and if you are struggling with this, then it’s pretty easy to get into the habit of overthinking and over-analyzing everything that happens in your life, including what others say, think, believe, and do.
But whatever has caused you to value the opinions of others more than your own, the most important thing is how we are going to fix it.
I have found that reading inspiring books that focus on changing our mindset – and specifically, those that teach us how to let go of what the world wants us to do – can do wonders to shift this problem.
Furthermore, I’ve learned that listening to audio versions of empowering books on platforms such as Audible, can have an even bigger impact on inspiring you to change your life.
There is something truly special about hearing the words of the author out loud.
Well, for me,
- The most important points seem to stick better in my mind.
- I am more present when listening than when reading.
- I can do other jobs while listening like go for a walk!
Audible is a paid subscription but in my opinion, totally worth the money. I have been an Audible loyal customer since 2012 and in that time, I have listened to countless self-help books which I could have not afforded if I was buying each one. Thanks to this subscription I have packed in lots of books over the years and I can’t recommend it enough.
Top 5 Books About Not Caring What Others Think
You can find all of the books below on Audible.
But if you’d prefer to stick to the paper copy, that’s still perfect! All that matters is that you start absorbing the content and taking action. You will find links to Amazon.com under each book.
So, let’s get started!
1. Not Nice by Dr. Aziz Gazipura
Not Nice: Stop People Pleasing, Staying Silent, & Feeling Guilty … And Start Speaking up, Saying No, Asking Boldly, and Unapologetically Being Yourself
This is a life-changing book and I believe it’s a must-read for anyone struggling with self-confidence and failing to be who they are.
Dr. Azid Gazipura is a brilliant clinical psychologist with many years of experience helping clients change their mindset but has also worked hard to transform his own mindset which makes him even more special.
In this book he explains how “not to be nice” in a simple, calm and effective way.
If you are someone who apologizes too much, often feels obliged to do things so as not to upset others, or just doesn’t feel that you are the authority in your own life then this book is for you.
Dr. Aziz can show you how to switch your mindset from being a “people’s pleaser” to becoming “yourself pleaser”, which is not only going to benefit you but also the people around you.
He also provides some great exercises at the end, and if you throw yourself into them, you will be surprised on how far you have come.
I found this book extremely relatable because throughout I kept thinking “that’s me” or “I do that” which was also comforting to know that I wasn’t the only one.
Dr Aziz has helped me to understand,
- how to speak up,
- how to ask for what I need and want,
- how to stand up for what is fair and right,
- how to set boundaries, and
- how to tell people no.
2. You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero
You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life
I absolutely love You Are a Badass by Jen Sincerio because it is packed with lots of great and relatable advice on how to get rid of self-doubt and start living the life you truly desire.
Jen is a New York Times bestselling author, success coach and motivational speaker who has helped countless people transform their personal and professional lives.
In this book she teaches us how to
- change our mindset
- align with source energy
- achieve business success
- attract abundance
- plus, lots more.
She does this by combining her extensive life experience with everything she has learned from countless self-help books and seminars over the years.
Jen cleverly applies her deep understanding of the universe/source energy to modern life using lots of practical and relatable examples.
She writes using relaxed and everyday English including profanity, which for me was highly effective.
When I read or listen to this book – and I have listened to it over and over again – I feel as though she is my friend who truly wants me to take action to follow my dreams.
If you want to stop caring what others think, get rid of self-doubt, attract the life that you really want, and don’t mind that Jen’s tone is not “prim and proper” then this book is for you. I can’t recommend it enough!
3. The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck by Sarah Knight
The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck: How to Stop Spending Time You Don’t Have with People You Don’t Like Doing Things You Don’t Want to Do (A No F*cks Given Guide)
Sara Knight is a woman after my own heart. She describes herself as a writer, editor, and recovering perfectionist, and I love her style and manner.
If you want someone to teach you in a modern, cool, and in NYC style – with quite a bit of profanity : ) how not give a “F*ck” then this book is for you.
Sara spent 15 years working in the New York publishing industry after which she walked out and transformed her life.
She can teach you things like how to
- free yourself from your own ‘slavery’,
- change the opinion you have of yourself,
- stop procrastinating
- say no when you need to, and
- do the things that you want to do.
4. The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
The Four Agreements: Practical Guide to Personal Freedom (Toltec Wisdom Book)
The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is a wonderful book to help you change your mindset and let go of what others think.
If you are interested in indigenous cultures from long ago and learning their wisdom for an application today then this book is for you.
Don Miguel Ruiz writes gently and lovingly and can help you to find your own beauty within.
Using the four agreements he teaches us how to start appreciating oneself and others, while still being authentic.
He gives you the feeling that an elder is looking deeply in your eyes and telling you the truths of the world that come from years of experience and wisdom.
This is a truly inspirational author that many psychologists recommend to their clients, and if you are looking for words of wisdom this book is perfect for you.
5. F**k It Therapy by John C Parkin
F**k It Therapy: The Profane Way to Profound Happiness
John Parkin is a son of an Anglican preacher who realized after many years of studying eastern spiritual practices that saying “F**k It” can be just as effective as any ancient technique.
He transformed his life by saying “F**k It” to a top job in London and escaped to Italy to set up a retreat center with his wife where he now resides and helps people transform their lives from all over the world.
A friend of mine bought this book when it was translated into Croatian and when she recommended it to me, I read it in two days.
In this book John,
- helps us understand how we complicate our own lives, and
- shows us how we can change our lives and pursue what we love without feeling stuck.
This book has helped me to let go of so much unnecessary baggage in my life, which has also meant relieving lots of unnecessary stress and anxiety.
And if you like this book, you may even end up going to the retreat center in Italy one day!
Latest posts by Sandra Glavan, Life Coach for Gentle Anxiety Sufferers (see all)
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